She let her boyfriend drive—blindly romantic, like handing your GPS to a squirrel and hoping for Paris.Twenty minutes in, they’d circled the same gas station […]
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Beauty with a Spine
People always swoon over my beauty and fragrance—but the moment they meet my thorns, they call me difficult. Excuse me, darling—those aren’t flaws, that’s called […]
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Elbows Up
These days, Canadian maple syrup gets its own inspection line. Copper sets off its own metal detector. And Canadian hockey players? They get pulled aside […]
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Red-Hot Until Boiled
The crab strutted down the street like it owned the place. No one mattered. Nothing could stop it. It thought it was famous—red-hot and unstoppable.Until […]
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Seen Too Late
They called me an ugly duckling, time and again,so I stopped reaching for eyes that never saw me. And that’s when they finally looked—but by […]
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Held by the Deep, Not Defeated
The genius loved riding the waves of political and economic chaos—surfing it all in his shiny red Tesla. He thought he was in control… until […]
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One Jingle, Three Lifetimes
Forget facelifts — the ice cream truck jingle is my anti-aging serum.One note, and the old man in me straightens his back.By the second note, […]
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Roar All You Want, I Still Bite
The lion picked a fight with a mosquito.The mosquito said, ‘Bold move — starting a war you can’t catch.’Three sleepless nights later, the lion surrendered… […]
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Commander-in-Chip
Joke:A robot sitting behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office, wires neatly combed, presidential seal glowing. Caption:“After replacing truck drivers, copywriters, and customer service […]
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Hard-Boiled Delusion
The egg had a dream: to shatter the wall and prove everyone wrong.First attempt—he cracks a little.Second—he shatters more.Third time—he launches himself like a legend… […]
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